That time I was unemployed

I took a crazy, terrifying leap of faith at the end of January and quit my job without the slightest inkling of where I would work next. It felt right to leave my job, however hard and tear-filled it was, and I just had to go and trust that the Lord would take care of me. I wasn't completely unemployed - I did odd jobs here and there and they were awesome - but I couldn't find a full time job for almost 3 months and it was hard.


A few things I learned while being unemployed:

If you apply enough time, you can get very good at ANYTHING
I taught myself to crochet this past December, but once I didn't have a job, I dove in head first and went crochet crazy. I watched countless YouTube videos and bought skein after skein of yarn. I made scarves galore, hats, a single mitten (I didn't love it so I didn't make the second), and attempted a crochet beard/hat combo.

I will never get sick of doing puzzles
You stick me in front of a TV and turn on the never ending stream of shows on Netflix, and I could do puzzle after puzzle and still ask for more. I prefer 1000 piece puzzles to 2000 piecers - just for future reference if anyone ever desires to get me a gift.

Living in you parent's basement after you graduate college is awesome, but only if it's for a limited amount of time
When I first moved in with my parents, it was only going to be for a couple weeks - a month tops, but I ended up staying for 3 months, because I couldn't find a job. It was fantastic to live with my parents and my brothers again, and to get to know the youngest brothers better because they were so young when I moved out and they didn't really remember living with me. Family is so important. However, it is also so important to move on in life and be independent and living in my parent's basement was not the answer.

Through trials (like not getting a job) there are still HUGE blessings
Early on in my unemployed state I realized that I had an amazing and rare opportunity in front of me: I had nothing to spend my time on except to focus on bettering myself. I decided that this was the perfect chance to form habits that had always been hard for me to form because I felt I didn't have the time. I made it a priority to take care of myself both spiritually and physically. I won't lie, I didn't do very well with the whole working out and being healthy thing, but I did go running a few more times than usual. However I did take the time to not just read but really study my scriptures daily, make sure daily prayers and conversation with my Heavenly Father were a priority, and attending the temple once a week. This is honestly the only thing that kept me sane.


I'm pretty sure I say this in almost every blog post, but life is crazy and unpredictable. I never know what's going to happen next and I am so grateful for all of my experiences, no matter how outrageous and dumb they feel in the moment. I started a job in mid-April that is the perfect job for me, and I'm so pleased that I didn't find anything else before this job came along. There are always hidden blessings, and sometimes you don't see them until later, but God knows and that's what is most important.

The world didn't change, I changed.

I've learned a lot this past week or two. I may have fallen behind in my school work and not paid enough attention in classes, but life lessons have been learned, and sometimes it's okay for the other things to fall by the wayside for a bit.

I made a friend recently who has changed my view of world. He has taught me through his example what it means to be completely committed to your values and your standards. A lot of the people that I am surrounded by in my life know what is right and do it because that's what you do... not to say that they don't believe and are amazing people, it's just that they have never had to question their motives for the way they live their lives. But my friend has had to change his life around, and he has completely thought through every thing he does and consciously made the choice to live the way that he does. He has made me question WHY in pretty much every aspect of my life, and I've learned so much about myself. I can't rely on any other person to reason away my actions. I have come to KNOW what I believe and understand how those beliefs relate to my actions... Yeah, my whole perspective and approach to life has changed a bit. I'm loving it.

Also, I've been trying to understand and accept the Lord's timing in my life. Sometimes I just don't understand why I can't just know right now what I'm supposed to do and where I'm supposed to go in my life instead of trying to figure it out along the way. Things happen in life that are so frustrating and disheartening, and it's hard to see the purpose behind them. So I've been trying recently to just accept that I don't know everything and that God does. He has a plan for me, and it might not make sense to me right now, but it makes perfect sense to God and that it is just what I need. Having faith in His hand in my life and His love for me is what will help me to get through trials. Here's a video that we watched in my Living Prophets class yesterday and it was just what I needed:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EMwKxmTLaCs

"Don't demand things that are unreasonable, but demand of yourself improvement." Yes, yes, yes. Amen. Hallelujah. The End.

Growth.

Alright, here's the deal: I've learned SO MUCH in the last 6-9 months or so. Honestly, I don't think I've ever had such a defining half year in my entire life.
There have been so many events, both big and small, that have changed me and changed my life. Here's just a few of the things I have learned in 2012:

• No matter how far away they are or how long we go without speaking, my best friends will still always be there for me
• Missions are awesome
• It is so hard to have those I'm closest with leave on missions, but I wouldn't have them anywhere else in the world right now
• I am loved.
• I am not perfect, and that's okay
• It's more important to be humble than hilarious (though there is nothing wrong with also being hilarious)
• I love hearing mission stories
• How to ask for help and advice
• Love is not something that I can control. But if I allow it, I have the capacity to love everyone.
• The importance of studying
• How to be more open with others
• Being vulnerable is not a sign of weakness
• I have to rely on the Lord for my confidence; I can't rely on myself.
• Fear is not something that belongs in my life.
• Hiding my thoughts and feelings does not benefit anyone.
• I am surrounded by the best, most inspirational examples and it is the biggest blessing I could have right now.