Employable.

Now let's address what I have been doing since graduating from college.
What's that you say? I forgot to mention that I graduated from college? Well, surprise! I did that.

I finished the last of my graduation requirements in August. All I had left was to finish my internship and turn in my final research paper - which ended up being far more work than anticipated. But it's all done! I'm done! I graduated! And it was official about a month ago when my diploma finally came in the mail. That was a very exciting day of my life.
It's kind of funny how important a single piece of paper can be in the world. I spent 4 solid years of working my butt off for that piece of paper. I crammed my brain with so much knowledge and spent countless hours in the library studying and writing papers. And you know what? It was absolutely worth it.

So what HAVE I been doing?

Well once I graduated, I was no longer eligible to work in my on-campus student employee job, so I found myself unemployed. Isn't it interesting that upon graduating from college I lost my job? It's usually the other way around, but it's fine.
And thus began my weeks of unemployment. Having absolutely no obligations to my name in the middle of August? You would think that sounds like a heavenly end to the summer, but let me tell you, it was miserable. I have been in school and working for 4 years straight, and have gotten used to that fast-paced movement and then all of the sudden BAM - I was sitting home all day, everyday watching netflix and reading fantasy novels. The first day was great. I slept in, I went for a jog, I didn't have to shower until after lunch, and I watched at least 5 episodes of Once Upon A Time. But then the second day happened and I realized that I was going crazy. I needed a job. I applied to seriously at least 40 jobs; it was ridiculous. I was unemployed for a good 2-3 weeks, and I really think I went crazy. But then I was blessed and got a great job! Basically, life's just moving right along. Good work team.

Here at the end of all things

So once upon a time yesterday, I realized that in one week I will be 100% done with classes for my undergraduate degree. This made me so sad. I complain about school and homework and papers and finals all the time, but you know what? I love it all. I have been so blessed to be able to go to college and further my education and expand my horizons. I love learning and seeing new perspectives on all sorts of situations and contexts. I'm not necessarily a pro at being a student, but I'm very comfortable with it. Here at the end of all things, I realize how much I took for granted in my education. There are so many things that I was taught, but I never learned. There were so many people that could teach me so much, but I didn't appreciate their stories or their knowledge. Now that I'm more mature (don't laugh at that), I wish I could go back and do school all over again and learn all the things!
But here it is... I only have two days of class left, and I really just don't know how to feel about that. You know that feeling when you were in the middle of a sentence but then get cut off and distracted and you feel like something is unfinished, and you feel that way until you finally finish your thought? That's kind of how I feel about my education. I feel like I'm stopping before it's really done. I have so much left to learn and so many people still to meet and learn from.
Now I realize that finishing school is not the end of my learning, but do you realize how much harder it is to learn when I don't have deadlines and scheduled times for people to stand up in front of me and share their knowledge? This kind of life long learning requires motivation and dedication and out-of-my-way effort. Completely worth it, but still exhausting.
So there it is. This time next week I will have taken my last final. I will have gone to my last review and sat in my last two hour lecture. I don't mean to be nostalgic, but if you haven't figured out already, I'm the most nostalgic person I know. I remember my first day of class freshman year.. Strangely enough it was Intro to Sociology, which is funny because that was 2 years before I EVER decided to declare sociology as my major. Funny how things work out like that. Sociology has shaped my personal theology and the way in which I approach the world. I think about that first day of college and I see how much I've grown and changed, and I realize that while I may not have taken advantage of every opportunity here at school, I most definitely have learned more than I ever thought was possible. How is it that the more I learn, the more I realize I still have left to learn?

Has spring arrived?!

Happy April!

This is such a good month. Seriously. In the past, I've never been a big fan of spring. Not that I don't like it, I just preferred the other seasons... but I am definitely in love with this spring!
It just is beautiful and it rained the other day and it is getting warmer and people are just happier -- well most people... maybe not college students because they have final projects and final tests.

Guess what happens this month? I am walking at graduation! Not that I'm actually graduating until August; but I definitely am going through the motions and feigning graduation this month. I am so excited! After this semester, I have 1 class to take during spring term and then an internship that goes through August. So pretty much, past June, I am DONE with my undergraduate career. Honeyboosaywhat?!?! Yeah, I can't even believe that.

Spring brings new life, and I've found that this year it also brought new perspective on life. From here on out, I'm going to be the most happy, fun, positive person you've ever met. It is going to be sickening how much I love life. And you know what else? Christ lives! I'm serious. That is one thing that I know for absolute certain.

That is all.

Recap of the birfday.

So I had a birthday last week, right? Well, let me tell you: that was one of the best birthdays I've had in a very long time. I think a lot of it probably had to do with the fact that it was a Friday. A lot of it was also because I have the best friends, family, and coworkers in the world.
My roommates brought me out of my room at midnight, as soon as it was my birthday and gave me gifts.

This is when I opened The Lord of The Rings Collectors Edition Pez Dispensers!!! You may not know my love for pez dispensers, but I definitely have an obsession there and this was the best edition to it ever. Favorite part? That the hobbits, Gimli, and Gollum are shorter than everything else. Bahahaha! THIS was a great gift from my roommate KayJoy.

Then my family came and took me to lunch that day. It was rockin. We went and Pita Pit it up and they are hilarious and wonderful. These are the two youngest of the brosephs - love them: 

Then my writing class was fun and they gave me treats, it was like I was in elementary again! :) And then one of my lovely friends took me out to dinner and even talked the waiter into bringing me a free eclair! And finally, that night was the beginning of the celebration of Halloween. I was Scary Spice and we fake party-hopped... I saw one of my VERY best friends of all time for the first time since he's been home from his mission! I was so so so happy! And then we went to multiple different dance parties that were lame and ended up just throwing our own in the living room. It was perfect. Seriously, I love birthdays. I love the extra attention that comes to you on your birthday and I love friends and gifts. SO GOOD! I'm 22!

Celebration.

22.
That's a palindrome.
It is also my age as of today.
Weird.

I'm glad I was born.

It begins again.

The summer has come to an end. A terrible, tragic end. I have a feeling that this next year is going to be a relatively defining one for me. You know, with the whole "graduating from college and finding something to do with my life" thing. It's kind of terrifying.

This summer has been one of the best in the history of summers (which is a pretty long history, in case you were wondering). We created a list back in the first of May of all the things we wanted to do this summer. I must say that I am please to announce that we did EVERYTHING on this list, minus white water rafting, which I was fine with because that slightly frightens me. We took a road trip to California (one of the highlights of my summer), saw all of the awesome movies that came out this summer, ate lots of delicious food, made some incredible friends, went on lots of adventures, took pictures of most everything, and just laughed our heads off because we are that funny. We really had so much fun! I really do have the greatest friends in the universe.
As just an example of the excitement that is our lives: the other weekend, we watched 7.5 hours of Anne of Green Gables in one night. I can't explain to you the love that I have for Gilbert Blythe.

Anyway, so now it's over. On the plus side, everyone has returned to Provo, including pretty much all of my friends who went on missions. Can you believe it's been two years? I can't. I am THRILLED beyond reason to be able to hang out with those wonderful human beings again. They were greatly missed.

Ok, here's the real reason this year scares me: I am a senior. A senior in college. Remember back in the day, a full 4 years ago when I was a senior in high school? That does not feel like it was that long ago, but alas, it was. WHat am I going to do after I graduate? I have many potential plans, but they all require me to be an adult and move on with my life. Change, especially big change like this, scares me so much. Once I get going, I love it, but the anticipation of change scares me to death. Welp, we'll see what happens in this next year. It will be fun, that's a given because I always have fun. It will be difficult. It will be scary. But I'm excited for it. Life is fun... I just have to keep telling myself that.

They are wed.

Marriage is a topic of much conversation around me at this point in my life. Lots of things contribute to the excessiveness of this marriage-speak: my age, the fact that I'm not on a mission, the university I go to, having one of my best friends get married last week, having an engaged roommate. It all culminates to just too much sometimes.

Sharesa got married last Friday. She is one of my best friend from high school and one of my closest friends to have gotten married thus far. It's such a strange thing. But good. She was beautiful. And she's in love. And Ian adores her. I am a fan of all of these things. She deserves the best.
I love when I go to my friends weddings or I see them with their fiance or with their spouse and they are just happy. There is something about this inexpressible happiness that I love and everyone deserves to have it.

Also great: cute old houses. These can often come with marriage as well. My lovely roommate, Cebre, is getting married in a month and 2 days (not that we're counting) and I went and saw her new house yesterday. It is adorable. Seriously, there is something about cute, old houses that is just super romantic and fun and joyous. We were running and galavanting about her house exclaiming over it's beauty and it's homeyness. She has a parlor. A PARLOR. And a window seat and windows that swing open and must be latched closed. They have a fireplace, a red accent wall, a kitchen that doesn't need to be shared with anyone else. Maybe I've just been living with 5 other girls for too long, but having your own kitchen sounds like heaven. Needless to say, but I'll say it anyway: I want her house. Or at least it's equivalent. SO cute. Honestly, it reminded me of the house I lived in in Ohio, maybe that's why I loved it so much. But mostly I think it's because of the romantic, old house feeling that is in every corner of that home.

So basically, lots of my friends are getting married and living in cute places and I am so happy! They are lovely human beings and I love that they are in love. Life is good. (This here song just came on. It was kind of eerie how perfectly timed that was.)

Elder Lever.

I have a brother. Well, actually I have a lot of those. But this particular brother of whom I speak is the eldest of the five and he is going on a mission. Well, hopefully all of them are going to be going on a mission, but his mission is actually here upon us. And by that, I mean he leaves in ONE WEEK.
And to decode this message for you: Ryan is out. To Scotland/Ireland. To share the truth and help bring eternal life to these great people. He will be a missionary for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints,  the Mormons, if you will. He's going to be amazing.

So, Ryan and I are two years apart in both age and school. But age has never really separated us. Maybe I'm just remember the good times, but honestly, I feel like we've been best friends for a solid 19 years - his entire life. Especially through high school. We are friends with each others friends. We hang out. We used to attack each other in the hallway of the high school. Basically, he is wonderful. This is us back in the day...

But lets get real, obviously there is no way that we've always gotten along.. true, we fight sometimes. Actually, he's probably the one of my brothers that I fight with the most, but in the end, we stop the madness and end up just laughing our heads off at some ridiculous bit of humor.
We have the same sense of humor. All of my brothers do. Apparently our humor is unique and most don't understand it, but we do and we have WAY too much fun laughing at our jokes. Ryan and I can just sit there going back and forth, beating the same jokes to death for hours. It never gets old.
We even look alike. Lets get real, anyone that has ever seen us thinks we're twins. We are the same person. Check this pic, we even laugh the same:

Ryan is the best. I don't know what I would do without him in my life. He listens to my ridiculous stories; rolls his eyes and shakes his head, but listens nonetheless. He has always been my shoulder to cry on, my bodyguard, my source of advice, my own personal comedian, my best friend. He is adventurous and kind and would never admit it, but is just adorably sensitive as our dad. Ryan has a testimony that is obvious through everything he does in his life. He is an example to me and inspires me to be a better person. I just love him with all of my heart.
I can't even put into words how much I'm going to miss this boy. But I also can't express how proud I am of him. He is going to touch so many lives. I can't wait to write to him all of the time about the craziness that is my life.
When I look at him, I still see this cheesy, adorable little kid:

But really though, he's like a man and I'm so excited to see him grow even more spiritually and emotionally these next two years. Not going to lie, it's going to be sad when Ryan leaves and I'm not going to know what to do with myself, but I wouldn't have him doing anything else with his life right now. Go get 'em tiger.

One more picture, just because I love this one:

Late

Welp. I can't sleep tonight. Hence the reason for 2 blog posts in one night. This has never happened before! Crazypants.
Time goes so fast. I was just about to go off on this topic, but then I remembered that I already have. THIS blog post speaks to part of how I'm feeling right now.  I can't believe how much I have done in my life, but I also can't believe how young and inexperienced I am. I feel like a baby, but somehow I think I've grown up somewhere along the way. I look at my 13 year old brother and I wonder when he stopped being a baby and became this teenager who is taller than me and sounds like a man. That blows my mind. And the real baby of the family is 7. SEVEN years old! He thinks he's a regular adult! Wow, time is so weird.

I am a nut case sometimes. Today is one of those times. I was going to write everything that I'm thinking that is keeping me up tonight, but I promise that no one wants to read my word vomit. And that's exactly what it would be. Just let it suffice to know that I love life. I freak out a little bit sometimes, but that's not a bad thing. I adore where I am. I adore the people I know. My life is a win.

Changes.

Well gorsh. <--- in my head that sounded like Goofy... but typed out it looks ridiculous. Just go with it.
This past week has been one of the most busy and emotionally-roller-coastery weeks of my life. One of my bestest friends got married. Another gave her talk before she leaves on her mission. And I said goodbye for a year and a half to another beautiful friend who's also going on a mission. I have been roommates with all three of these girls and I could not ask for better friends.
To Mandy, Kendra, and Krystal: I LOVE you girls with all my heart. That ain't never gonna change.

This weekend was the first time that I realized that I really am growing up. I thought I was growing up and everything was going to change when I graduated from high school and then again when I first went to college and then again when all of the guys left on missions... but that seems like nothing compared to my current situation. Those changes over the last few years have shaped who I am and it has been quite the journey. But for some reason, these wonderful girls leaving on their missions is a way bigger deal to me than any of the guys leaving. And obviously marriage is a huge life changing experience as well.
I think that what I've come to realize this weekend is that life is never truly going to be the same again. Everything is changing around me, and I need to learn to roll with it. Sure, in the future we're all going to get together for lunch and laugh our heads off just as much as we do now... but it's not going to be the same. We all have our own lives we're leading; we're adults and each of us is doing something slightly different with our lives.

Normally I am a big fan of change, but these recent changes are a lot to take in. I know I'm still in the same place I have been for a couple years and it's not me making the big life changes right now, but I am still overwhelmed by the effect these changes are having on my life.
If I can say I've learned one thing through this crazy weekend, it would be this: The place I'm in in my life right now is super unique. It can change very quickly, so I need to take advantage of it while it's still here. I love where I am, but change is good. Kind of terrifying and makes me want to cry at times, but still very good.
I'm growing up. I am learning to accept that change can not be stopped. I already miss the way things were, but I also know that the future is going to be rockin.

Life really never turns out exactly the way you expect, but it always turns out the way it's supposed to.

Here is a song that is wonderful. And reminds me of my current situation.

We like to party.

Wednesday was the celebration of my birth. It was pretty normal day: work, class, funny friends, eat, try to nap. But then the night came and life got exciting.

Kendra and I bought tickets to the So You Think You Can Dance live tour back in July. This was my birthday gift to myself. It was a brilliant move on my part. The day had finally come and this is our excitement as we were leaving the apartment that night:

We have a tradition of eating Chinese food while watching SYTYCD, so naturally we ended up eating Vietnamese food while driving to the SYTYCD tour. We were in a hurry, so I had to eat on the road. Don't worry, we didn't die.

**Edit: in response to the many people that were freaked out by this picture, I must offer a word of reassurance. 1- I was only eating at red lights. 2- I put the food away once we got on the freeway. 3- hahahahaha! I promise I'm not a terrifyingly dangerous driver. End edit.

Then we finally arrived. This is our ecstatic faces right as we got to our seats. Note the SYTYCD sign directly behind us. Yeah, we had ballin seats.

Then they danced and I went crazy. It was AMAZING! This is when I splurged (again) and bought myself a sweet t-shirt:

These human beings are so incredibly talented. It just amazes me what they've trained themselves to do and I love the fact that they are sharing their talent with me. The show was amazing! I love my Kui, and I'm so happy that she went with me! This is when we met Mitchell (one of the amazing dancers) and he gave me a hug because I said he was adorable. It was great.

So basically. I lost my voice. I watched some dancing. My mind was blown. I laughed a lot. I danced a lot myself. And my birthday was FABULOUS!

And then that night when I got home, Kaylee and I decided to have our annual all-nighter. Here's a sneak peak picture just to spark your excitement and curiosity:

Guess what!?

I'm 21 today.

Beat That.

Sister Yoshi.

It's a really strange feeling when your best friend/roommate is old enough to open her mission call. That means she's 21. That means she's a full blown adult. That means that I'm older than I feel. Here's the story:

Kendra at 6:00: "I'm opening my mission call at 6:15!"

Kendra at 6:20: "I'm opening my mission call in half an hour!"

Kendra at 6:50: "They'll be here in 15 minutes, and then I can open my mission call!"

Kendra at 6:55: "5 more minutes! Ahhhhhhhhh!"

7:00 - Walbeck's arrive with the fated mission call.

7:01 - "Sis. Walbeck, you have been called to labor in the TOKYO, JAPAN MISSION!"

7:02 - Mass screaming ensues. Hugs are thrown about. Tears are shed.

7:03 - "Finish it! When do you leave?!"

"You will enter the Provo MTC on December 28!"

Mandy: "You won't miss the wedding! My heart almost stopped!"

The rest of the evening: Mass hysteria and happiness and phone calls and smiles and tears.

Sister Walbeck, You are the best roommate ever, and you will be the most amazing missionary. I love you. Go teach you some Asians and connect with your native country.

Returning

Yesterday I attended the "I just got home from my mission so I'm going to tell you about it in the context of the topic I've been given" talk in church of two of my friends from high school. These are the first two boys that were in my grade to return home from their missions. And within the next year, most of my friends will be coming home as well. This realization brought about all sorts of thoughts and feelings.

I have been graduated from high school for over two years. Oh wow.
Two years seems long when they first leave.
I can't believe how fast two years actually goes by.
What have I accomplished in the 2 years since I last saw my friends?
How much have I changed?
How much have they changed?
I will be 21 in two months. Oh my heavens.
I'm filled with joy at the thought of seeing old friends again.
I am a Junior in COLLEGE!
I hadn't realized how much I missed these boys until I thought about them coming home.
I love reminiscing about our old adventures.
We used to be crazy and do outrageous things.
Have I become boring since they left?
I can't believe my brother is almost old enough to go on a mission.
Time is a funny thing.
My friends are a funny thing as well.

Camp.

The young women of my ward are leaving for girls camp today.
I am filled with sadness that I am not accompanying them.
Girls camp is one of the greatest things that has ever happened to me.
I thrive in situations that include me making a complete fool of myself for long periods of time.
So obviously girls camp is the place for me.
Ridiculous camp songs. Crazy skits. Crafts. Beautiful hikes. Outrageous games of Ride That Pony and Big Booty. Fire-roasted food. Snipe hunting. Forcing girls to be excited to be there. Endless amounts of energy.
These are a few of my favorite things. (yes, that was a Sound of Music reference)
But really, I just love girls camp and have ever since my first experience when I was 12.
I have been too old to go for the last couple of years. And that is a tragedy.
If I could go to girls camp every year for the rest of my life, I would die a happy human being.

This is one of my favorite pictures from from any girls camp:

We really get into singing and dancing camp songs.